Storm after the calm #2

Fear has flawed me
Flowed through me endlessly
Gripping my enthusiasm 
Stuck in my back like a spasm
It's not fear of losing you
Will I find me the way I am
If you walk away?
And if I do, will I need
The houses and the streets
The long empty roads
And the sound of the wind
Should I pack some lessons
Or learn to let go
Will my inhibitions walk along?
Asleep after a storm
Not used to too much peace
If everything's going right
Why are my eyes laid on the other side
Could I walk past
Every lane that could remind
Making rejections my check post
Levying taxes am unaware of
Paying anyway as I move
Back onto the same roads
Not to test but to find
The parts I left behind
My bags are filling up this time
Despite the emptiness
My eyes are bright
I taste fear again
This time I am used to the game
Your aching heart
Has no hold over me
Why are you right here
And I can't feel a thing?

Ethically Unethical

People often blatantly
Shamelessly and selfishly
Turn green with envy
Pretending to be well wishers
Then when I scream
I am asked to calm down
And sheepishly questioned
Is there a deeper anger lying within!

No you brainless lost soul
Pretending to be naive
Your unethical ways
Have left me distorted
You stayed too close
I had let my guards done
Now the gates are bolted
With the keys hanging out

Come in or go away
I am okay with whatever it is
Let's be friends
Let's pretend to care for a little longer
Let's act like we have missed each other
And when we feel better
Let's not let each other know
That we will be fine without the other

Uncertainty

Sometimes I count my blessings
Other times I drown in fear
Hustling with ideals
Swinging around dirt
Skipping lanes easily
To find a shortcut
Sometimes I feel good
Other times I have doubts
Feeding the undesired
Sparing the sunshine
Running away from illusions
Some yours many mine
Some days are terrible
Other days sense prevails
I harbour myself to the moment
Letting the questions fade
I build a little shelter
And I ask for no rent
Sometimes I am amazed
Other days completely dazed
Why are my verses so long
Why do I feel unheard
If I am good you are too
But if you doubt I blow out
Some times I accept
Sometimes it's enough
Sometimes we go in circles
More like a cyclone

It's TIME

There comes a time
We are told often
When things will make sense
There comes a time
We make ourselves believe
When we would be free of pretence
There comes a time
That moment of realisation
That we keep waiting on
There comes a time
You put your guards up
To avoid damage from storms
There comes a time
Whether we like it or not
When we are called on our truth
There comes a time
When we sail into nothingness
Labouring for the fruits
That time shakes and moves us
That time needs us to be true
The time when the final verdict is set upon you